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"Have you ever wondered why Osama lives in a cave?" |
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13 May 2005 Ya'alon: Bin Laden's location known |
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JIHAD THIS |
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Don't you
think taking a picture is just a bit pointless guy? |
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| Who says the Muslims aren't
funny?
Here are some jokes from that crazy Muslim standup comic..... ladies and gentlemen please give it up for.... Goffaq Yussef! Good evening gentlemen, and get out, ladies. You have no right to be having a good time. What do you say to a Muslim woman with two black eyes? Nothing! You told her twice already! How many Muslims does it take to change a light bulb. None! They sit in the dark forever and blame the Jews for it! Did you hear about the Broadway play, 'The Palestinians'? It bombed! What do you call a first-time offender in Saudi Arabia? Lefty! Did you hear about the Muslim strip club? It features full facial nudity! Why do Palestinians find it convenient to live on the West Bank? Because it's just a stone's throw from Israel! Why are Palestinian boys luckier than American boys? Because every Palestinian boy will get to join a rock group. A small plane carrying Yassir Arafat and all his top lieutenants crashes and all aboard are killed. Who is saved? The Palestinian people! In Israeli nurseries the sign says quiet please. In Palestinian maternity wards the sign says? "Live ammunition." A Palestinian girl
says to her mommy, "After Abdul blows up, can I have his room?" Osama allowed a short visit to Heaven After his death, Osama bin Laden was allowed a short visit Heaven. There he was greeted by George Washington, who proceeded to slap him across the face and yell at him, "How dare you try to destroy the nation I helped conceive!" Patrick Henry approached and punched Osama in the nose and shouted, "You wanted to end our liberties but you failed." James Madison entered, kicked Osama in the groin and said, "This is why I allowed our government to provide for the common defense!" Thomas Jefferson came in and proceeded to beat Osama many times with a long cane and said, "It was evil men like you that provided me the inspiration to pen the Declaration of Independence!". These beatings and thrashings continued as John Rudolph, James Monroe and 66 other early Americans came in and unleashed their anger on the Muslim terrorist leader. As Osama lay bleeding and writhing in unbearable pain an Angel appeared. Bin Laden wept in pain and said to the Angel, "This is not what you promised me." The Angel replied, "I told you there would be 72 Virginians waiting for you in Heaven. What did you think I said?" ---------------------------------------- AMERICAN HUMOR: A man is taking a walk in Central park in New York. Suddenly he sees a little girl being attacked by a pit bull dog . He runs over and starts fighting with the dog. He succeeds in killing the dog and saving the girl's life. A policeman who was watching the scene walks over and says: "You are a hero, tomorrow you can read it in all the newspapers: "Brave New Yorker saves the life of little girl". The man says: - "But I am not a New Yorker!" "Oh ,then it will say in newspapers in the morning: 'Brave American saves life of little girl'" – the policeman answers. "But I am not an American!" – says the man. "Oh, what are you then? " The man says: - "I am a Saudi !" The next day the
newspapers says: "Islamic extremist kills innocent American dog. Cowboys vs Muslims: Three strangers at the Great Falls airport are awaiting their flights. One is a Native American on his way to Helena for a statewide Indian Pow-Wow. Another a ranch hand on his way to Billings Montana for a stock show. The third passenger is a fundamentalist Arab student, newly arrived, and on his way to study engineering at Montana Tech. To pass the time they strike up a conversation on recent events, and the discussion drifts to their diverse cultures. Soon the westerners learn that the Arab is a devout radical Muslim, and believes his people are justified in their 'holy' war. The conversation falls into an uneasy lull. The cowpoke leans back in his chair, crosses his boots on a magazine table and tips his big sweat-stained hat forward over his face. The wind outside blows and blows and the old windsock flaps but no plane comes. Finally, the Native American clears his throat and softly he speaks:" Once, my people were many, now we are few." The radical Muslim raises an eyebrow and leans forward, "Once my people were few," he sneers, "and now we are many. Why do you suppose that is?" The Cowboy shifts the toothpick to one side of his mouth and from the darkness beneath his Stetson Cowboy Hat says, "That's 'cause we ain't played Cowboys and Muslims yet boy." ------------------------------------------- FAA PROFILING: FEDERAL AVIATION ADMINISTRATION TRANSPORTATION SECURITY SCREENER ATTITUDE ASSESSMENT … To insure we Americans never offend anyone, particularly fanatics intent on killing us, airport screeners will not be allowed to profile people. They will continue random searches of 80-year-old women, little kids, airline pilots with proper identification, Secret Service agents who are members of the President's security detail, 85-year old Congressmen with metal hips, and Medal of Honor winning former state Governors. In accordance with this policy, Transportation Security Screener applicants are being asked to take the following test, which will ensure that employees do not harbor hidden biases that could lead to unfortunate assumptions: --- In 1972 at the Munich Olympics, Israeli athletes were kidnapped and massacred by: a. Olga Corbutt --- In 1979, the U.S.
embassy in Iran was taken over by: --- During the 1980's
a number of Americans were kidnapped in Lebanon by: --- In 1983, the U.S.
Marine barracks in Beirut was blown up by: --- In 1985 the cruise
ship Achille Lauro was hijacked and a 70 year old American passenger
was murdered in his wheelchair and thrown overboard by: --- In 1985 TWA flight
847 was hijacked at Athens, and a U.S. Navy diver was murdered by:
--- In 1988, Pan Am
Flight 103 was bombed by: --- In 1993 the World
Trade Center was bombed the first time by: --- In 1998, the U.S.
embassies in Kenya and Tanzania were bombed by: --- On 9/11/2001, four
airliners were hijacked and destroyed and thousands of innocent
people were murdered by: --- In 2002 the United
States fought a war in Afghanistan against: --- In 2002 four
French journalists, including one woman, were dragged from their
cars near the Pakistan border with Afghanistan, taken behind some
rocks, and shot to death by: --- In 2002 reporter
Daniel Pearl was kidnapped and murdered by: --- American Airlines
Flight 63 from Paris to Miami on December 22, 2001 had a passenger
with a ‘Shoe Bomb’ who tried to blow up the plane but was over
powered and captured by passengers was: --- In May 2004
American Businessman Nicholas Evan Berg was captured in Iraq and
beheaded by: Now, please review your answers according to the following key: ‘D’ – as in all answers are ‘D’ If you answered any of
the questions incorrectly, please go to the following link and
immediately apply for an airport screening position ...
http://www.tsa.dot.gov/
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Other Great Links at Bible Probe
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